I’m not even kidding.
My toddler is a weirdo because…
…he insists on saying “Hiiiiiii!” to everyone he passes in the grocery.
…he sticks his tongue out when he is thinking.
…he kisses with his mouth wide open, like his teeth are about to get checked by the dentist.
…he doesn’t like ice cream.
…he is obsessed with remote controls.
…he is even more obsessed with ears. He is constantly touching either his or ours.
…he likes things with a strong flavor. His favorites are raspberries and sharp cheddar cheese.
…if he sees a bottle or hears the word, he turns into a little monster that repeats “Bababababa…” until he has a bottle in his hand.
…he blows kisses using his arm or the back of his hand.
…he dances like this…
…he used to think giving a “high-five” meant you wanted to palm his face (that one was my bad).
…he hates holding hands.
…he found his manhood, and won’t let go of it.
…he makes himself gag and puke if he doesn’t like the texture of a food (awesome, right?).
…he thinks it is hilarious when our cat bats at him with her paws (don’t worry, she is declawed).
…he skipped crawling and scooted instead.
…he has to take the bumpers off the shelf in his playroom as soon as he enters.
…his head has been in the 99th percentile since he was born.
…he loves me unconditionally.
All this weirdness…and he couldn’t be more perfect to me! I couldn’t imagine him being any other way.